I love this picture, actually I think it may be my favorite picture of my little man! It's from Christmas Eve and after opening and arranging ALL of his presents from tallest to shortest (of course all of which were either trains, cars, dinos or bugs) he is perfectly happy. Most kids would be playing - mine organizes. I guess I can kind of laugh about that now because it's been almost a year since we found out he has autism. It's something that would have really bothered me even six months ago, but if there's anything I've learned in the past 10 months it's to love your children (family and friends) the way they are. Stop trying to change them because if everyone was the same this world would be a very boring place! I'm not advocating that we just throw out therapy and behavior modification, because we all know that's the best option for our little ones on the spectrum. But what I am advocating is just loving them no matter what. Sometimes the desire to change things that can't be changed leads to misery... the "what ifs." I'm one of those people, I'm a worrier, but in 2011 I have one goal - to focus on the positive instead of the negative! If JD can do that, so can I!Friday, January 7, 2011
The Most Wonderful Time of the Year!
I love this picture, actually I think it may be my favorite picture of my little man! It's from Christmas Eve and after opening and arranging ALL of his presents from tallest to shortest (of course all of which were either trains, cars, dinos or bugs) he is perfectly happy. Most kids would be playing - mine organizes. I guess I can kind of laugh about that now because it's been almost a year since we found out he has autism. It's something that would have really bothered me even six months ago, but if there's anything I've learned in the past 10 months it's to love your children (family and friends) the way they are. Stop trying to change them because if everyone was the same this world would be a very boring place! I'm not advocating that we just throw out therapy and behavior modification, because we all know that's the best option for our little ones on the spectrum. But what I am advocating is just loving them no matter what. Sometimes the desire to change things that can't be changed leads to misery... the "what ifs." I'm one of those people, I'm a worrier, but in 2011 I have one goal - to focus on the positive instead of the negative! If JD can do that, so can I!
Friday, November 19, 2010
Dinosaurs ROAR!
Thanks to Dino Dan on Nick Jr., JD has a new love - DINOSAURS! I must say, it's a nice substitute for Thomas... not that playing trains for two solid years wasn't fun! Here are some pics of his new favorite toys. He's doing wonderful and everyday I'm so thankful to all of the people that have helped us get to this point. I know the future is bright and no matter what it brings we are in it together!
Friday, October 8, 2010
Update on Diagnosis
It's been a very busy month in autism land at the Graham household. JD started the month with a 6-month update with his pediatric developmental specialist. Her name is Dr. Cely and she is wonderful! The great thing about the meeting was that she felt that JD was making HUGE strides in his language and motor skills, so his CARS assesment number went down 10 points, moving him into the PDD range! We are really excited, because it feels like the last six months of non-stop therapy has really helped him. The biggest leap was in his speech. When we started JD had 5 words, all which focused on Thomas the Tank Engine. Now he's over 100 words and he can actually communicate his needs (for the most part!)
The funny part of the appointment was that Dr. Cely told us that she felt that JD would eventually be re-diagnosed with Aspergers when he was in elementary school. I was totally shocked. I didn't think he was anything like an Aspie. However, she pointed out a few things to me that I never noticed. First was that his biggest problems are social - he gets obsessed with certain items (like his trains) and does not want to do anything else. He's not really sure how to play "appropriately" with others, but instead of shying away, he's too in their face. It's like he doesn't have the same personal space issues that most people are born with. He falls apart when things don't work the way he wants them to, which I guess is part of this perfectionism of Aspies. The one thing that I thought was funny was that she asked me if he ever lines up things at home and I said no. I guess I just never noticed it before (probably because we're at therapy pretty much all day so he never has a chance to do that!) but today he has the day off and look what he made... a perfectly lined up arrangement of his trains. I guess I was wrong!
The funny thing is that I left the appointment happy. Most people would be torn apart learning that their child might has Aspergers, however it was a relief to me. I just hope that he continues making progress and is still a happy, healthy little guy :)
Monday, September 27, 2010
Loved This!...
I was wondering around the internet tonight looking up stuff on autism and PDD and I found a page with this info on it. I thought it was a great summary of what life is like with a high-functioning kid on the spectrum!
Although it is similar to Autism, a diagnosis of PDD or Asperger's means that a child functions on a higher level, both cognitively and socially, than what you might expect (particularly if you've seen the movie, Rain Man). Common challenges children with mild Autism/PDD/Asperger's may face in the classroom:
Associative Memory - While many people think more logically or linearly; those with Autism, Asperger's, and PDD tend to be visual thinkers. Instead of thinking in language, they tend to "think in pictures." We have found great value in giving our child pictures to refer to when he's having difficulty with a concept, particularly those that are more abstract.
Auditory Processing - Children with Autism, Asperger's, and PDD typically have problems processing things they hear, particularly if it's a large quantity of information. Sometimes, the lack of speech comprehension is interpreted by others as an unwillingness to obey. And sometimes, it could be be just that! However, many times you may find that the child will comply with instructions if they are shortened, written down, or given with visual cues and pictures.
Fixations - Many children with Autism, Asperger's, and PDD get fixated on one subject, such as cars, trains, calendars, or maps. They may refuse to read books unless they're about their subject of interest. The best way to deal with this is to use their interest as motivation for school work and other things they need to do. Teachers often have success by alternating a book on their favorite subject with another book they want the child to read. The child gets to read the one they want as a reward for reading the one they'd rather not.
Food Issues - It is sometimes difficult to get autistic children to eat, and sensory issues play a big role in this. What we have found, is that changing the shape, color, texture, or size of the food or the plate it is served on can be quite helpful.
Extremely Literal - This can often catch you off guard. One child thought that the alarm for the fire drill at school was an actual drill. He thought the drilling was what caused the noise for the alarm.
Handwriting - Delays in fine motor skills and problems with motor control in their hands can make writing more difficult. Children with fine motor delays usually receive occupational therapy to help address this; but in the meantime, the child may need to write with a marker instead of a pencil to make up for the lack of force exerted by their hands. On another note, some children may write only with upper case letters. This is probably the result of their resistance to change, but it could also be that the fine motor delays make it difficult to form the lower-case letters.
Meltdowns - Sometimes, despite your best efforts, the child may have a "meltdown" because he/she just cannot handle something. The best thing to do is give him/her a safe place to calm down and regroup. This place should be chosen ahead of time, and it should be as quiet and as soothing/non-stimulating as possible.
Resistance to Change - Maybe a better term would be, "difficulty dealing with change or anything unexpected." Something simple like calling to speak to grandma on the phone can be a challenge if grandpa answers instead. Sameness and predictability are essential in the early days and weeks in a new classroom, particularly for younger children. Later, it is always best to warn about any changes ahead of time. They may feel the need to ask a lot of questions to help themselves understand the change and how it will affect them.
Sensory Processing - Sights and sounds that are tolerated by "typical" children may cause pain, confusion, and/or fear in children with Autism, Asperger's and PDD. The best way to describe this is to imagine waking up in the middle of the night, thinking you heard a suspicious noise. All of your senses are on heightened alert; and the next sight, sound, or touch could send you through the roof. This is how many children with Autism and PDD feel when they enter a room for the first time, encounter a new situation, or experience stress.
Theory of Mind - Children with Autism, Asperger's, and PDD have difficulty comprehending that others don't know something. It is quite common, especially for those with savant abilities (special gifting), to become upset when asking a question of a person to which the person does not know the answer. Theory of mind refers to the notion that many autistic children do not understand that other people have their own plans, thoughts, and points of view. They may also have difficulty understanding the beliefs, attitudes, and emotions of others.
Although it is similar to Autism, a diagnosis of PDD or Asperger's means that a child functions on a higher level, both cognitively and socially, than what you might expect (particularly if you've seen the movie, Rain Man). Common challenges children with mild Autism/PDD/Asperger's may face in the classroom:
Associative Memory - While many people think more logically or linearly; those with Autism, Asperger's, and PDD tend to be visual thinkers. Instead of thinking in language, they tend to "think in pictures." We have found great value in giving our child pictures to refer to when he's having difficulty with a concept, particularly those that are more abstract.
Auditory Processing - Children with Autism, Asperger's, and PDD typically have problems processing things they hear, particularly if it's a large quantity of information. Sometimes, the lack of speech comprehension is interpreted by others as an unwillingness to obey. And sometimes, it could be be just that! However, many times you may find that the child will comply with instructions if they are shortened, written down, or given with visual cues and pictures.
Fixations - Many children with Autism, Asperger's, and PDD get fixated on one subject, such as cars, trains, calendars, or maps. They may refuse to read books unless they're about their subject of interest. The best way to deal with this is to use their interest as motivation for school work and other things they need to do. Teachers often have success by alternating a book on their favorite subject with another book they want the child to read. The child gets to read the one they want as a reward for reading the one they'd rather not.
Food Issues - It is sometimes difficult to get autistic children to eat, and sensory issues play a big role in this. What we have found, is that changing the shape, color, texture, or size of the food or the plate it is served on can be quite helpful.
Extremely Literal - This can often catch you off guard. One child thought that the alarm for the fire drill at school was an actual drill. He thought the drilling was what caused the noise for the alarm.
Handwriting - Delays in fine motor skills and problems with motor control in their hands can make writing more difficult. Children with fine motor delays usually receive occupational therapy to help address this; but in the meantime, the child may need to write with a marker instead of a pencil to make up for the lack of force exerted by their hands. On another note, some children may write only with upper case letters. This is probably the result of their resistance to change, but it could also be that the fine motor delays make it difficult to form the lower-case letters.
Meltdowns - Sometimes, despite your best efforts, the child may have a "meltdown" because he/she just cannot handle something. The best thing to do is give him/her a safe place to calm down and regroup. This place should be chosen ahead of time, and it should be as quiet and as soothing/non-stimulating as possible.
Resistance to Change - Maybe a better term would be, "difficulty dealing with change or anything unexpected." Something simple like calling to speak to grandma on the phone can be a challenge if grandpa answers instead. Sameness and predictability are essential in the early days and weeks in a new classroom, particularly for younger children. Later, it is always best to warn about any changes ahead of time. They may feel the need to ask a lot of questions to help themselves understand the change and how it will affect them.
Sensory Processing - Sights and sounds that are tolerated by "typical" children may cause pain, confusion, and/or fear in children with Autism, Asperger's and PDD. The best way to describe this is to imagine waking up in the middle of the night, thinking you heard a suspicious noise. All of your senses are on heightened alert; and the next sight, sound, or touch could send you through the roof. This is how many children with Autism and PDD feel when they enter a room for the first time, encounter a new situation, or experience stress.
Theory of Mind - Children with Autism, Asperger's, and PDD have difficulty comprehending that others don't know something. It is quite common, especially for those with savant abilities (special gifting), to become upset when asking a question of a person to which the person does not know the answer. Theory of mind refers to the notion that many autistic children do not understand that other people have their own plans, thoughts, and points of view. They may also have difficulty understanding the beliefs, attitudes, and emotions of others.
Monday, September 20, 2010
My love for Brown Bear...
Six months ago seems like an eternity away at this point. JD has come so far and sometimes it's easy to forget where we were in March. One thing that always makes me smile is sitting and reading Brown Bear Brown Bear at night with JD. I remember when he was diagnosed that he didn't know ANY of the animals. He couldn't say any of the names, he didn't point at them, nothing. Jason would sit each night and read him the book and go out of his way to make these great animal sounds for him, which JD loved. Eventually JD could imitate the sounds each animal made, but still couldn't say the actual name of the animal. We were stuck in this mode for months. Then eventually it's like the light turned on. We sit at night and go through the book and he can name every single one! At the last page, I'll ask him to point out each one and he will! He knows all the sounds they make and the colors. It's amazing and it humbles me to know what in six months we've done more than I could have imagined with him! So for this I say that I officially love Brown Bear! :)
Saturday, September 4, 2010
My Little Gators!
It's the best time of year... college football season! And just to make things even better I got a picture of all the kids in their Gator gear. This is the FIRST picture I've taken with of all three of them voluntarily sitting together looking at the camera!! HOORAY!!! :)
The month of August was a really great month for JD. He finished summer classes and had a week off (which I must say was a little rough) and then started back for fall. His preschool is amazing! He has a new teacher for the fall, her name is Miss April, and she's so wonderful. Each month I'm amazed at how much he learns and how easier his life gets.
A few big accomplishments to note...
1. He learned how to say "help" on his own!
2. He learned how to say and sign the words "please" and "more"
3. He's arranging items by color now at school!
4. And his vocabulary just keeps increasing because he will repeat words after saying them once, where it used to take weeks before he would repeat!
5. He'll give Ashley a HUG!
I think my favorite part of the day is when we go into his room right before bed time and work on his speech. He LOVES flashcards and we go through probably 50 a night. He loves to read and will now sit and listen - in the beginning he had no attention span for that.
It's just amazing at how far we've come in 6 months. I'm so proud of him and how hard he works for things that come so naturally for other kids his age. He's such a little hero to me!
Monday, August 9, 2010
July Accomplishments!
This month was a good one. JD finished summer camp at All Therapy Connection and he starts back in August for the school session. I'm really excited because he's made so many strides since we started there. I can't say that everyday I'm so up beat, lately I think I've been finding myself down when I sit down and think that this journey will be for the rest of our lives. I know we're actually very lucky to have what we do with JD - he's an amazing boy with a huge personality and more love than I know what to do with. But when moments come when you see another person with a child that's probably a year younger than yours and they are so far past them in development that it makes your heart sink a little. I always wonder why I didn't notice his issues sooner. But I can't beat myself up - really, what difference would it have made? It's not like it would change the fact that he has autism. I guess that's why I try to stay positive, it's easier to get through the day when you think of the good rather than the bad.
JD has come so far in so many ways, but there are a few things that stand out to me. One of those things is listening to a request and completing it. I remember back in March when he was diagnosed I didn't think we'd there, at least not this quickly. At that time if you said, "JD go get your cup" he had no idea that: 1. you were even talking to him, 2: what the heck a cup was and 3. that you wanted him to do something with the cup. I'm always so thrilled when he responds to a request now!
Another funny thing that stands out in my mind are three words: NO, MINE and DONE. Most parents hate the day their children begin saying these words, however this month JD finally started using these words to express his feelings without acting out in violence! I personally love these words now and I can't tell you how happy I am to hear the word done rather than pick food that's been thrown off the floor!
All in all it's been a good month. I'm really looking forward to fall though, this summer heat is killing me. I can't wait to meet the kids in JD's class - I'm really going to miss his friends Matthew and Mason who were his buddies during summer. They are off to "big kid" school which is pre-K! I wish them all the best of luck!
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